Jack Red reviews Sonic Labyrinth

Hi everyone I am Jack Red today I have played many good and bad Sonic games but here's one so unspeakable that most fans hate it with a flaming passion. Sonic Labyrinth on the Sega Game Gear can make anyone go insane if played long enough I am dead fucking serious. You can own Sonic Mega Collection Plus that adds six Game Gear games with two Genesis games with some sound issues.

The story doesn't appear in the game but rather the fucking manual basically Dr. Robotnik secretly switched Sonic's shoes with slow ones. You got to play through four labyrinths broken into four levels each. You can't run yet you could use those bumpers to jump up in a few levels is assssss. You need to collect three keys in most of the levels now that's a fucking pain in the ass. If you played Sonic 3D Blast then you know some of the flickies can be annoying yet it's more fun than playing this.

The enemies are really uninspired that it bores me to even look at them. The game plays like a broken Sonic Spinball complete with not being able to save yourself from falling off a ledge. Hey I got a question what the holy ass were those fucking terrible developers doing. The music makes most of them want to commit suicide yeah I am not making that up it's that bad. The levels are so frustrating, boring torture that can make most who play the game lose their minds.

Sonic Labyrinth has the lamest mother fucking goat sucking son humping red neck shotgunning emperor's asshole bosses. The bosses in most games are usually short yet fun while some of them are hard. The bosses in Sonic Spinball make the ones in this game their bitches yes they suck that bad. They start out throwing a bunch of little versions of themselves before they finally appear. Most games cut the bullshit but letting us fight the boss then we end the level our selves.

I often joke that Sonic Spinball was the worst Sonic game on YouTube but the god honest truth Sonic Labyrinth gets the mother fucking title. Why because it took away speed with the story sucking some major ass that has the worst game play of any Sonic game I have ever experienced. This game is Sonic fans worst nightmare it has so many problems that most of them do hate it as much as I do.

I did actually play through this horrible mess my god it makes me want to play other bad Sonic games. I mean give me something that sucks though not as bad like Sonic 06 or Tails Skypatrol.
Oh I forgot to bring up about the fucking time limit now you can spin dash just not as good as other games. Getting one of the keys actually gives you more time now that's not too bad of horrible problem. I also don't care much for how on all the boss levels you get to slide down getting rings.

That seems kinda point less yet that has the best use of the controls of the entire game. Some of the levels can be confusing like one of the last couple of them you got to find a secret platform at the bottom. How are you supposed to know that because the first moving platform only goes one direction yet trying to spin dash your way across won't work. There was a couple of levels using paths that throw you all over the places now that's beyond the glitches in Sonic 06 if you asked me.

I had enough of this game I would like to ask any Sonic fan to get a copy of it then destroy the game as violent as possible. I hope you like my review and see you all later good bye fuckers.

Jack Red reviews Sonic Colors

Hi everyone this is Jack Red I just got Sonic Colors early this Christmas since I'm the good son in my family. I got to say when I first heard of this game that I never expected it to be this good. It's a sequel to not so great Sonic Unleashed while taking it's game play concept to what it was supposed to be. I am not taking about the overly repetitive Werehog one I am talking about levels that are 2D with several parts being in 3D.

I wanted to clear up that there's two different versions of this game now I am reviewing the Wii version. If you wanted a good Sonic game to hold you over until you get your hands on Sonic 4 then this is the game for you. This game is about Sonic arriving in Eggman's Amusement Park to stop his plot as usual with strange aliens. That may not sound like much but believe me that are the spice of the game play. Why because each one you come across in this game acts as a power up that's surprisingly addicting.

It does have a world map like it's prequel however it's done much better here. You don't have to search around areas to find levels deep in the game. You just keep beating levels within each area of the game with a few may take a few tries to figure out what to do. The bosses are some of the most fun in the entire series like my favorite Egg Wisp that uses some of those alien powers against you. The music blows my balls off with pure excellentment, I highly want you guys to listen to a couple of the songs.

Sonic Colors has some of the best graphics with controls I have ever experienced with the Wii. The cut scenes used The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog as direct inspiration which was a nice tough. It took me over six hours to beat this game while I got in the thirties some levels of Challenge Mode. There also exist Game Land which is where you can get Chaos Emeralds that's right you can become Super Sonic.

Altered Beast on the Genesis lets you keep playing in the ending credit yet it wasn't much fun. Sonic Colors took that idea then made it my personal favorite ending credits. I never played a game where you are awarded for bashing all the names of the people behind the game with lives.
I got to say I am really impressed by the game then I want to play Sonic 4 even more badly.

I just found out the same guy who made that good movie based on Mega Man series is now making one on Sonic. That shit is going to be fucking good in fact I want a copy of it when the movie comes out. Jaleel fucking White is in the movie as the voice of Sonic how can this get better. I highly support this man making the movie hoping it will be much better than Sonic movie released right the same time as Sonic Adventure.

I hope you enjoy my review and talk to all of you later.